Method and Purpose (Xposed – Part 2)

In 2000, I was a healthy, hearty, happy 260 lb married winner of a trip to President’s Club at work; by the next year, I was a stricken, sickened shell of the fat, cheery man I once was, unable to hold a normal job due to illness and forced into an exile by betrayal and a lack of faith in the human race. By autumn 2001, I had lost over 100 lbs in 8 months to an infestation of ulcers in my pipes, a problem exacerbated by the stress of divorce. Everything, including water, would pass through me in minutes, regardless of proper time or place, calendar or commitments. At a fundamental level, I had to void every couple hours, including at night, which led to an ending cycle of broken sleep. Anemic. Abandoned. Overworked. Overtired.

Under the gun. This bitter state continued relentlessly until 2013 when I found equilibrium with my storms. Discovery of that equilibrium, and how the process changed me to my core foundation, is a focus of these blogs, my creations, and my art. It guides my method and influences my purpose. My work is inked with the passion of my pain and the color of my dreams, and that dye bleeds into my core, setting the internal skeletal framework alight and alive.

It wasn’t always that way. In fact, while I was once voted “Most Artistic” of my high school, I veered away from creative endeavors once I married. In truth, I hadn’t found my passion or voice yet, so my ex-wife was shocked when my artistic side started bleeding through my emaciated smile.

It took losing half of my body weight, most of my possessions and loves and all of my known sense of direction to find my way. It wasn’t by accident that I became an artist focused on production and evolution. I toyed with the concept throughout my life, through creation of elaborate Dungeons & Dragons Campaigns to producing two comic strips in the college newspaper, from assisting rock bands to publishing websites and running forums.

The Imagineer was always within, looking for a compass and real commitment.

When it comes to religion, I’ve always had a complex relationship. I was brought up in a mixed household (Father is Roman Catholic, Mother is Protestant) where my loving parents granted me freedom of choice. I attended church and Sunday school when I was young, visited amazing places of worship in Germany and Italy when I lived in Europe. I also was a lover of Greek mythology and dinosaurs when I was a very young boy and was confused by the conflict of one God versus many, monotheism versus our polytheistic past.

But I also visited Auschwitz, Anne Frank’s house and other dark places of human history. Talk about humbling trips. When I truly had adult freedom of theological lean, I chose Agnosticism; after jarring events like 9/11, the unnecessary wars and the rise of ISIS, I chose Humanism. I may not believe in a God or subscribe to any associated mythologies, but I do revere human beings, their exquisite diversity, and their vibrant passions. In the absence of answers, mythologies were born, which evolved into passion enclaves with pulpits and preachers. The robes became more elegant, but many of the inhumane practices remain the same.

I’ve found it best to be boundless as an artist. It is the only way to objectively experience art, culture, and nature and find ways of incorporating them into my methods and creations. Satanic symbols are often present in my work, but I am an atheist. I don’t actually believe in any of the horrors I create. I just reflect the dark reality we’ve built for ourselves.

I work to be a human mirror, one with cracked and jagged and off-color perspective.

All artists are part of the color wheel of this mosaic, not removed from it. We bleed the pain of this planet, its creatures, and this species into our creations so the memories of this place are not forgotten. The minor of my English degree was in Humanistic Studies, the appreciation of the history and culture of Humanity through art, religion, philosophy and a variety of other topics. I studied the Bible for a year, as well as Eastern religions, such as Buddhism, Taoism, and Hinduism. I probably don’t remember as much as I should about all of them, as an English major must read a maddening amount of content during his degree study, but I did come away with a Humanist mindset and an appreciation of the human species. In all hues.

And possible futures. Along the way, I became fascinated with Leonardo Da Vinci and his intersection of art and science. I am also intrigued by the progress of technological evolution, and its impact on human societies and our collective creature. I created a Secular Transhumanist Facebook page some years to curate content on the subject. I invite you to visit it if you want more information on the subject.

https://www.facebook.com/seculartranshumanism/

It’s also my duty to not be a selfish human. I go to secondhand stores in the area and “rescue” fine art pieces that are relegated to the thrift store trash heap. I do my best to support other artists in my network by purchasing their product (even if I can’t make it out to every show, I still do my best to be present). I volunteer my time towards United Way and other agencies at my day job. I give to the poor when possible. These are my attempts at being “Resident”, and my duty as an #Artrovert. I would do more if I had more resource that I could commit to others.

https://www.facebook.com/artrovert

And time management certainly is a challenge when you work a day job a day run your own art brand in the background.